My child is having a meltdown: what do I do?

Every single one of us has been in this position. Our child is overwhelmed and is experiencing a meltdown: crying, yelling, kicking, rocking, pacing, hyperventilating, withdrawn, unable to communicate.

Your priority in these moments is to stay in control of your own emotions!

• make sure your child is safe from hurting themselves or others,

• take a few deep breaths,

• slooooooow down your thinking and your actions,

• stay away from immediately jumping in to “fix” the problem,

• keep your feelings to yourself,

What I am asking of you is to go against your natural instincts of trying to fix whatever it was that caused all this distress and overwhelm to your child. I know, I am asking A LOT! But bare with me just a little bit more!

Take a few seconds to look inwards and check in with yourself. What is going through YOUR mind? What are YOU feeling? What is coming up for YOU? Maybe you can even ask yourself “What am I feeling right now?” It might be anger, embarrassment, fear? And that’s ok! These are all natural feelings to have.

Validate your feelings! Our feelings are always ok! Our actions is what we need to control. If you are feeling embarrassed, that’s ok! If you are feeling angry, that’s ok! If you are feeling afraid, that’s ok! Repeat after me: “It’s ok for me to feel this way” or “This is a challenge for me”.

Continue breathing, and encourage yourself! If you don’t take care and check-in with yourself, no-one else will. YOU can do this! Your child has not yet learned how to do this. This is the moment you take care of yourself, AND teach your child how to take care of themselves. “Yes, this is hard, but I can do this!” and “We are ok. I am ok. I got this!”