Parents’ guide to addressing bullying behaviour
As parents, we want our children to grow up to be kind, empathetic, and respectful individuals. However, sometimes, our children may engage in bullying behaviours that leave us feeling concerned and unsure of how to respond. In this blog post, we'll explore why some children resort to bullying, what signs parents can look for from a young age, and how to recognise if your child is currently involved in bullying. Most importantly, we'll discuss strategies to support your child and help them make positive changes.
Why children bully
Lack of empathy: Some children struggle to understand others' feelings and perspectives. Without a fault of their own, they may genuinely not understand why what they are doing is wrong.
Seeking power: Bullying can be a way for a child to exert control and dominance over others. This can be a result for a number of reasons, including feeling powerless at home, having anxiety or low self-esteem.
Modelling behaviour: Children who bully sometimes learn these behaviours from exposure to negative role models; usually at previous schools or within their family.
Frustration or insecurity: Bullying can be an outlet for unresolved emotions in themselves.
Prevention
Teach empathy: Encourage and teach your child to consider others' feelings from a young age.
Open communication: Create a safe space for your child to discuss their feelings and experiences. Explain to them that it’s perfectly acceptable to feel frustrated, anxious, jealous at times, teaching them healthy coping mechanisms.
Monitor online activity: Keep an eye on their online interactions and address any concerning behaviours. Children and teenagers still have a long way in their emotional and social development, so online use should be closely monitored by you. Discuss openly any concerns you have.
Model respect: Demonstrate respect and kindness in your own interactions. Children learn by modelling from you! Who better to train their children in kindness and respect, than their own family?
Recognising signs of bullying behaviours
Aggressive behaviour: Frequent aggressive acts, such as hitting or name-calling.
Social isolation: Your child may have difficulty forming positive relationships.
Avoidance of responsibility: They may avoid taking responsibility for their actions.
Possession of power dynamics: Displaying a desire to control or dominate others.
Strategies to support your child
Open dialogue: Initiate honest conversations to understand their perspective and feelings. Your child has a reality of their own, their own reasons for choosing bullying actions. Explore them openly, potentially offering replacement behaviour options.
Set clear expectations: Establish clear boundaries about respectful behaviour – both at school and at home. Explain that as a family you promote respect to others.
Teach conflict resolution: Teach your child healthy ways to resolve conflicts and express emotions with others. It is very likely that they don’t know an alternative way. So learning this from their loving parents can be helpful!
Positive role models: Encourage them to look out for positive role models, and learn from them.
Professional guidance: Consider seeking support from a mental health professional.
Promoting change
Consistent consequences: Implement consistent consequences for bullying actions.
Reinforce empathy: Encourage your child to consider the feelings of others.
Monitor progress: Keep an eye on their interactions and assess their progress.
Seek professional help: Consult with a mental health professional who can help your family support each other, and teach your child how to change their bullying behaviours.