How-to react when your child is going through a panic attack
Panic attacks can be one of the scariest experiences for an individual, especially if they are the one witnessing it. It can be very unsettling, especially as a parent, not being able to help your child when they are experiencing a panic attack.
Before we dive into the how-to part, let’s first talk about what is a panic attack!
Scientists define panic attacks as episodes of intense anxiety which are experienced through physical symptoms such as rapid heart rate, sweating, trembling, or having trouble breathing. It is a sudden intense fear that comes quickly and can be gone within minutes.
This definition grasps what happens but doesn’t really explain really what’s going on. Mel Robbins explains panic attacks in a very simple and relatable way. What happens during a panic attack is that the body is in an intense/excited state, but the brain can’t really find the cause of this physiological alertness. Therefore, the body is feeling afraid or anxious, but the mind cannot explain why, and this confusion makes it very hard to calm down. We, humans, thrive on understanding our body, emotions and physical reactions. Therefore, when we fail to connect the physical responses during the attack with an external or internal cause for them, we don’t know how to react, we don’t know how to make it better, and we simply don’t understand what’s happening - and thus why panic attacks are so terrifying for those experiencing them.
Now knowing the physiological reasons for panic attacks, we can potentially give our mind a stimulus to connect the body’s reaction to and thus calm down. In other words, when your child is experiencing a panic attack, you can give them a reason for this unexplained physiological alertness. You can give them a hug, remind them of something that excites them or something positive (i.e., an activity they might be looking forward to), and this will give their mind an explanation for the physical alertness they are feeling. Encourage your child to actually say how excited they are or how happy they are about something coming up. This will help their mind understand where the physical alertness is coming from and will help them calm down.
This method isn’t the only way to react to your child’s panic attack. You can also:
Reassure them that this feeling of uneasiness will go away soon, that it is temporary
Sit next to them and let them know they’re not alone
Help them regulate their breathing by taking deep breaths with them
Validate their emotions
It is advised that you avoid trying to fake a way out of a panic attack by telling your child ‘You’re okay, you’re okay!!’ Validate their emotions by understanding how scary it must be and be right there with them – empathy goes a long way.
It might also be helpful to educate children on what’s happening in their body during a panic attack and help them understand why it is so scary (as explained by Mel Robbins). This will help them be more likely to know how to calm themselves down better even if you are not around.
A lot of people worldwide are battling with panic attacks, and it is one of the scariest experiences. However, you can help your child fight it and discover methods that work best for them so as to be able to manage it better and decrease the distress it creates.